


The Infinite Act of Choosing You

by literati42



Category: Prodigal Son (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Things Happen Bingo, Brimel, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Found Family, M/M, Malcolm Bright Gets a Hug, Malcolm Bright Needs a Hug, Mental Health Issues, Romance, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:21:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23371603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literati42/pseuds/literati42
Summary: JT and Malcolm have been together for a couple of months, when out of the blue Malcolm breaks it off. Of course, the team and his family are not content to leave it at that. Neither is JT.An established relationship Brimel story.Bad Things Happen Bingo Prompt: Betrayal
Relationships: Malcolm Bright/JT Tarmel
Comments: 19
Kudos: 121





	The Infinite Act of Choosing You

**Author's Note:**

> Hey friends! This story was supposed to be a short one...but the characters had other ideas. I hope you all enjoy!
> 
> Prompt: Betrayal from the Bad Things Happen Bingo prompts on tumblr
> 
> As always please reach out to me on twitter @themythofpsyche or on tumblr @literati42, and if you like my writing, check out this link to learn more about my various projects:  
> https://existentialwednesdays.wordpress.com/2020/02/06/want-to-know-more-about-me-as-a-fanfic-writer/
> 
> I hope you all enjoy!

Dani walked into the conference room with Gil and immediately clocked three things at once. JT was late, Bright was already there, and the profiler was putting off a mood so thick it was practically a dark cloud around him. She quickly glanced at Gil, seeing the same level of worry. “You good, Bright?” she asked. He looked up at her, and his expression startled her. She saw him struggling, fighting back emotions, but his far too revealing eyes were full of pain.

_-_-_

Bright was different lately. It started a little over two months ago. He had been so nervous when he showed up to the precinct one day, looking like something was bottled up inside him ready to get out. That day, she finally could not take it. “Just spit it out, Bright,” she said. He met her eyes.

“I think I love him,” the words fell out of his mouth like an accident. He looked scared, insecure, and even a hint hopeful. She did not ask who he meant. Dani was pretty certain that every cop in the precinct had picked up on the feelings growing between them. The detective rested her hip on his desk.

“You finally going to do something about it?”

Bright looked surprised for half a second before shaking his head. “I…he already did.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Finally.”

“You’re okay with this?” he studied her face.

“That depends. Are you happy?” She was not expecting the troubled look that crossed his face. “It wasn’t a trick question, Bright.”

“Dani…I don’t know if I can do happy.”

She kicked his leg gently. “Don’t overthink it.”

“Have you met me?”

“Yeah,” she said, “That’s why I’m telling you. Don’t overthink it. JT doesn’t play games.” She shook her head, “I know he doesn’t say a lot, but when he does say it? It’s real.”

“I know,” Bright said, but none of the fear disappeared. “So, why the hell would he want anything to do with me?”

_-_-_

“You good, Bright?” she asked, standing in the conference room now as he looked up at her with the dark expression. He stood up.

“I have a profile,” he said instead.

“Kid…” Gil said.

The conference room door slammed open. JT stood there, his eyes full of quiet fury.

_-_-_

Watching them fall in love, Dani kept thinking of how they stood in contrast to each other in every way. She would watch them talking at the coffee machine. JT with his three shirts, always practical, always inexpensive, and Malcolm in his thousand-dollar suits that seemed designed to be as impractical as possible. JT said something in his quiet, dry tone without cracking a smile. Malcolm laughed and touched his arm. He always touched JT uncertainly, as if he was not sure he was allowed. JT rarely returned the touch. He was not an outwardly expressive man, but when he did touch Bright—a hand on his elbow when he seemed ready to fall or bumping against his shoulder when Bright looked troubled—he did it confidently.

Bright was all explosive energy as if he could barely contain himself inside his own skin. He laughed, he cried, he screamed, and he rattled. His emotions were always right there in his eyes for anyone to read. Bright was the right name for him because nothing about him was subtle or understated. JT was steady and quiet. His feelings were an undercurrent, deep below the surface and expressed sparingly.

_-_-_

In the conference room, watching JT in the doorway and Bright by the board, their differences stood out more than ever before. Both of them were hurting, Dani knew them well enough to see it. Bright’s pain seemed to fill up the whole room, but JT’s ran cold. He slowly lifted his cellphone, a text message open. “What the hell is this, Bright?” he asked, words nearly toneless.

“JT,” he said the name like it hurt. “We have a murder…”

“Is the victim going to be more dead in ten minutes?” JT asked.

“We should give you two a minute,” Gil said, worry written in every line of his face.

“Yeah,” JT said, at the same time Malcolm said, “We don’t need a minute.”

JTs eyes never once left Malcolm’s. “You think you can just send a text like this and what…we work together like everything is normal?”

“I hoped,” Malcolm replied. His mouth shifted, like he was fighting back tears. “I’m going to check in with Edrisa.” He took a step toward the door, where JT stood. For a second, Dani thought the detective was not going to move, but slowly he stepped out of the way. Bright went by him. He let the profiler get a few steps away before he whirled around to face him.

“You went to see your father,” JT said to his back. Bright stopped and turned back slowly. “I know you did. You were fine yesterday, and then this?” He held up his phone again. “What did he say to you, Bright? That I’m lying to you? That I’m going to betray you? What?” The profiler stayed frozen there for a second, then he shook his head and fled. JT watched him go until the elevator doors closed behind him. “What are you looking at?” he growled at the nearest officer and strode off down the hall.

“Back to work,” Gil said to the officers before looking to Dani.

“If we were smart, we wouldn’t get involved in this.”

“Yeah?” Gil asked, “Maybe we’re not that smart.”

“I’ll talk to JT.”

“I’ve got Bright.”

Dani nodded, following after her partner. She found him staring out the window of the breakroom, his back to the open door. Dani gently rapted her knuckles on the door. JT did not acknowledge her, but she knew if she were not welcome, he would have said so. “JT.” She walked over and leaned against the wall beside him so she could at least read the side of his face. “What did it say?” JT handed her the phone, and she frowned at the message. It was four words.

It’s over. I’m sorry.

Dani saw a string of messages after it showing growing levels of emotion, but none of them were anger. She looked at JT. “You thought he was going to hurt himself.”

“I thought he already had,” JT said the words, barely a whisper. “He sent that at 4 in the morning. I had my phone off.” He shook his head and looked at her. “I went to his place this morning, and he was gone…”

She thought of JT’s face when he walked in. She noticed for the first time the hurried way he dressed. JT had rushed here in desperation only to find Bright standing in the conference room like nothing had happened. Her partner looked at her.

“He went to Claremont, I know it.” He clenched his fist, “I should go talk to that son of a bitch.”  
“No,” Dani said, her voice firm. “You don’t need to talk to his father. You need to talk to Bright.”

“Yeah, cause that went well.”

Dani acknowledged this with a nod.

“So what,” JT said, sarcasm sparking in his voice. “He woke up in the middle of the night and decided to tank this?” He met Dani’s eye, all surliness dropping from his tone. “That…”

“Sounds exactly like something Bright would do,” Dani replied.

“Dammit. I should have seen this coming.”

“Trust me, no one ever sees Bright coming.” She gently bumped her shoulder against JT’s arm. “He loves you.”

“So how long do I keep fighting with him to get him to believe that?”

Dani felt pain clench at her heart. She loved Bright too, over the years he had become family to her. She tried to keep her tone gentle and free of the conflict in her mind. “Do you want to stop fighting with him?”

“It would be nice not to have to,” JT said back in his usual dry way. “But if it means not having him at all…” She saw something shift in JT’s eyes until a look came over them she recognized from years of working by his side. JT Tarmel the detective gave way to JT Tarmel the soldier. He had a mission, and he was not about to let anything stop him. He gave her a firm nod.

“What are you going to do?”

“Whatever it takes.”

_-_-_

Gil was not even a little bit surprised to find Malcolm out on the steps of the precinct rather than in Edrisa’s lab. He knew the kid would want to be alone, but not go far. Work was Malcolm’s safe haven when there was something in his life he could not control. Gil could imagine how conflicted his kid was feeling when work was the place he was trying to escape from. Gil sat on the step beside him.

“How bad was it?” Bright asked before the older man could speak.

“It wasn’t good, Bright,” Gil replied. He was always honest with the kid. Malcolm had enough people in his life willing to lie to him. “What’s going on, kid?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“We’re a bit past the point where that’s going to cut it.”

“I don’t have anything to say that you’re going to want to hear,” he said. “It just wasn’t working.”

“Yes, it was,” Gil said. “In the last few months, you’ve been happier than I’ve ever seen you.” He shook his head, “But you already know that. So what is this really? Did you go to Claremont yesterday?” Gil’s eyes fixed on Bright’s hand, watching as the tremor came over it. He saw Bright tuck the hand under his chin to try and hide it. “Kid…”

“I don’t want to make you take sides.”

“Take sides on what?” Gil asked, shaking his head, “I can’t imagine JT doing anything to hurt you…”

_-_-_

Gil remembered when Malcolm stood in his office one day after a case, looking uncertain in a way that he remembered from the kid’s teenage years. He could tell it was not something bad, so he let the fond smile cross his face. “Alright, out with it.”

“We’re going to give it a try.”

There had never been direct words exchanged between them about this. Gil did not want to push, especially if Malcolm’s head had not caught up to his heart. But there could be no doubt who the kid was referring to.

“And you’re worried about what I think?”

“He’s my coworker, and you’re his boss, and the team is like family…”

“Yeah, it’s a logistical nightmare,” Gil agreed, but his smile grew. “You like him?”

The soft, scared smile came unbidden to Malcolm’s lips. He looked hopeful and afraid of it. “Yeah,” he said, one word, but it was enough.

It would have been enough just to see his kid have hope and a chance at real happiness, but this was so much more than that. Gil knew JT, trusted him on every level. There was no one more loyal, no one more reliable. He took a long time to let people in, but once they were past his defenses, nothing short of an act of god could dislodge them.

There was no one he would trust with Malcolm more.

_-_-_

“Of course he didn’t hurt me,” Bright replied quickly, fiercely, coming at once to JT’s defense against the very suggestion. “It was never going to be him that screwed this up.” Gil heard the familiar note of self-deprecation in the profiler’s voice. Malcolm shook his head and stood up. “Gil…I can’t talk about this. I can’t deal with this.”

Gil felt his kid pulling away, shutting down. He stood slowly. “Okay. When you’re ready to talk…I’m here, kid.”

“I know,” Malcolm replied.

“Why don’t you work the profile at home,” Gil said, giving Bright what he needed—to go home—but also what he wanted—to keep working. “I’ll call you with updates.”

Bright nodded. Before he could take a step away, his phone started dinging with messages. He spared the screen a glance and cringed.

“Is it Claremont?” Gil asked, cautiously.

“No, fortunately, they have refrained from giving him access to texting. It’s Mother.” He sighed, “Her charity event is tonight. She explicitly said nothing short of death is a good enough reason not to be there. So, I guess I still have to make an appearance.” Gil listened to the words, hurried and bumping into each other.

“She doesn’t know,” he said. The pain flashed through Bright’s eyes.

“I haven’t told anyone,” he said quietly. Gil reached out and squeezed his neck.

“I’ll be there tonight,” he said, but he meant, I’ll be there for you. He knew the profiler read the meaning in his words. “Come on. I’ll drive you home.”

Bright shook his head, “You have a case, and I can get a cab.” His voice was quietly pleading, “I need to be alone.” Gil gave a nod.

The detective watched his kid walk away. He was not sure if he was doing the right thing, but there was something fragile in the kid at that moment. There would be no pushing him now, not like this when he seemed to be barely holding it together.

_-_-_

Dani arrived early to Jessica’s charity event. The Whitly matriarch made sure to invite the whole team, something Edrisa had been chattering about all week. Jessica Whitly’s slow climb back to social prominence continued. In ways, Dani could not understand the appeal, why Jessica would fight so hard to be a part of people who clearly did not care about her. People who wrote her off during the darkest time in her life. Dani was not Jessica. When people turned their backs on her, Dani shrugged on a leather jacket to keep her warm against their cold shoulders and moved on. She had no time for people like that. Jessica, on the other hand, fought her way back, and she was so proud of how far she had come. So, the team agreed to come, in part to support Jessica and in part because it was going to be the first time Malcolm and JT went out together in this social strata. “Your debut,” she teased JT.

Of course, that was before.

Dani did not know what to expect from the event now, and definitely not from her two friends after what happened today. Despite that, she showed up. Over the two years since Malcolm started working there, the Whitlys—sans Martin, obviously—and the team became something more like family. So, Dani threw on a long curve-hugging green dress, did her hair, and came.

She flashed her invitation at the door the way she usually would flash her badge.

“Dani! Finally, someone normal,” Ainsley said, coming down the stairs in a little black dress and heels that were probably worth more than Dani’s entire wardrobe. “Everyone here is truly awful.” Dani raised an eyebrow at her.

“Actually, Ainsley, have you seen your brother?”  
“Not yet,” she said, “I think he decided to get ready here though, so he is probably in one of the changing rooms.” Ainsley motioned for them. Dani nodded, holding her clutch against her hip as she made her way down the hall. She wondered if stepping into the Whitly’s world would always feel a little like going undercover. She certainly doubted it would ever feel normal.

The hallway Ainsley indicated was full of little rooms that brides or debutantes or whatever else rich people could contrive, would use to change into their finery. Most of them were empty, but there was one shut door she noticed. She headed over to it when she heard a gasp of pain. Definitely Malcolm. It was not loud enough to raise emergency bells in her head if it was not for the fact that it was Malcolm.

She knocked on the door. “Bright?”

“It’s open,” he replied. She pushed the door open to find him, tie half done, holding his hand.

“You get cut on that starched collar?” she asked. He gave her the barest smile in response to the joke, which was almost more painful than the tears earlier. He lifted his hand, and she saw it was cut. She stepped forward and grabbed his wrist, raising it slightly. “Careful, you’ll get blood on that nice white shirt.” Dani grabbed a handkerchief—the price of which she refused to guess—off the table and pressed it against his palm. “What happened?”

He gestured with his free hand at a broken tumbler that seemed to have very recently contained some form of hard liquor, but now was no more than a mosaic on the floor. “Clumsy,” he said. She looked at him skeptically. Dani could feel how bad his hand was trembling.

“Bright…”

“I don’t want to talk about it, Dani.”

“Okay,” she said, keeping her tone quiet, level. She lifted the clothe. “We have to wrap this in something.”

“You’re…letting it go?” he asked, surprised.

“What do you want me to say, Bright?”

“Usually, you’d tell me how stupid I’m being,” he said. “That I’m letting the best thing in my life get away.”

She pressed the clothe back against his palm, “What else would I usually say?”

He shook his head, “That I love him, and he loves me, and I would be a coward for not fighting for it.”

“Well,” she said, “I sound smart.” He shook his head, pulling his hand back from her and going into the attached bathroom. He came back with a first aid kit. Dani took it from him, searching for cleaning wipes and a bandage. She cleaned the wound, dressed it, and then looked back at him. “There. We better get out to the party.”

“You’re staying?” he asked. He asked it with the same insecure surprise she remembered from the night when he got inadvertently high on the drug dealer case and asked her if they were friends. She saw the deep fear inside him that by leaving JT he would mean losing her too. She squeezed his wrist.

“Yeah, I’m staying.”

“There you are,” Jessica Whitly said, sweeping into the room in her stunning burgundy dress and pearls. Her eyes took in his still not finished appearance and then his bandaged hand. “Honestly, Malcolm.” She came in, moving into his air space beside Dani and began fixing his tie. “Could you try not to obtain any more injuries between here and the ballroom?”

“I will make an effort, Mother,” he said. Dani could still hear the note of pain in his voice, though he was trying to cover it, but Jessica clearly heard it too. She frowned, her brow furrowing. “Are you alright, dear?”

“It was a difficult case, but really, I’m fine,” he said. She nodded, then patted his lapel and reached up to straighten an errant hair.

“Do you need something to help with the nerves?”

“Mother, could you not offer me anything illegal with a cop in the room?”

Dani smirked slightly, “Don’t worry. I am not a cop tonight.” Jessica offered her a smile, then took her son by the arm and began ushering him toward the ballroom, letting Dani fall into step with them.

“Malcolm,” she said, “Where is your handsome paramour?” The profiler flinched.

“I…don’t think he’s coming tonight,” he answered, his voice thick as they stepped into the ballroom. Jessica’s frown deepened further, clearly trying to read meaning in his words. “This is really not his scene.”

_-_-_

Malcolm fastened his cuffs, standing in his kitchen, a month before the party. His eyes stared at the wall, but what he saw was a case board formulating in his mind. JT came up beside him, grabbing the cup of coffee Malcolm had set out moments before. “What’s this?” JT asked. Malcolm took a second reeling his mind away from the case, and he looked over. The detective held up an elegant invitation. “It has my name on it.”

“It’s an invitation to a charity event my mother is throwing,” Malcolm said, snatching it from JT. “It’s not important.”

“It looks important.”

“It is important to my Mother, but it's just going to be society types being catty to each other for a few hours over expensive alcohol while pretending to feel good about themselves. All because they dropped what to many people seems like a lot of money, but for them is really pocket change on a charity they probably do not know the first thing about.”

“Hm.” JT stepped toward him, and Malcolm leaned back against the counter, looking up at him. “You going to it?”

“I have to,” he replied. JT nodded, and Malcolm could see the thoughts rolling through his mind, but he could not begin to guess what they were.

“And your mother wants me there?”

He nodded, “My mother loves you.”

“So, it’s you that doesn’t want me there.”

Bright felt surprise run through him. He grabbed the front of JT’s shirt, “JT, no.” He shook his head.

“You don’t think I’d mix well with your level of people?”

“JT,” Malcolm said, shaking his head, “No. It’s not that at all. It’s just…you’d hate it.”

“Definitely,” JT said, nodding. “Would it make it better for you if I was there?”

Bright answered without hesitation, “Always.”

JT put his hands on either side of the bar, framing Malcolm. He leaned down and took his lips. Malcolm immediately returned it, pressing against him. JT deepened the kiss, pressing Malcolm against the counter. The profiler’s pulse began racing. He felt the dopamine and adrenaline and all the chemical processes bursting through his body, ignited by the touch. JT pulled away from his lips, but lingered teasingly close. “Is that a…you’ll go?” Malcolm asked breathlessly.

“What do you think?” JT asked, his voice a quiet rumble. He kissed Malcolm’s throat and stole his breath all over again. The profiler wound his hand into JT’s shirt, tugging him toward the couch. JT followed his lead, each step in unison, kissing him over and over until Malcolm felt drunk with it. He laughed, with delight, with happiness, with desire, and with the feeling of being so entirely safe.

They practically tripped together onto the couch.

_-_-_

Bright shook the memory away, feeling emotion choking up his throat.

“Who’s not coming?” Ainsley asked, joining them.

“JT,” he replied. She frowned, a look he saw from the journalist often when she was trying to get a story straight.

“What are you talking about, he’s over there with Gil,” she nodded toward the hall across from them. Malcolm turned around, searching. He immediately caught JT’s eyes, eyes that were already looking at him. His breath stuttered.

Malcolm had never seen JT dress up more than he did for the office, but here he was in a full suit. “He cleans up nicely,” Jessica said, clearly impressed even if she did add a low, “Not a quality suit mind you.”

JT started walking over, with Gil a step behind him. The look in his boyfriend’s—no his ex’s—eye was set, as if there was no one but Malcolm in the whole room, even as he walked through a sea of people. He came to a halt when they were five feet apart.

When he did not speak first, Malcolm forced out the words, “I didn’t think you’d come.”

“I said I’d come,” JT said, his tone level, but Malcolm could hear the slight off note to it. “I do what I promise I’ll do.” Malcolm felt the eyes of his friends and family on him, his team looking concerned, his mother and sister trying to puzzle out what was happening, but they all stayed silent.

“I know you do,” he answered slowly.

“Can we talk?”

The profiler shook his head, “There’s nothing to talk about.”

“So, you want to do this here then?” JT asked. “Fine. You think you can just break up with me over text, and I’m not going to demand a reason?” JT seemed to find something in Malcolm’s eyes, because he squared his shoulders. “I don’t accept.”

“What? You can’t not accept.”

JT shrugged, a challenge in his eyes. “Until you give me a reason, I don’t accept. So go ahead. Give me one good reason to walk away, and I will.” He took a step closer. “One reason.”

“I don’t love you,” Malcolm said, the words choking out of his throat. JT’s eyes narrowed.

“That’s not the reason,” he replied. “What did he say to you, Bright?”

Malcolm broke the eye contact for the first time since JT began walking toward him. “Nothing.”

“Right. So it’s a coincidence you go see your father, and then this happened the same day?” JT said, taking another step closer. Malcolm ran a shaking hand through his hair, turning away from him.

“It’s not that.”

“Yes, it is.”  
Malcolm whipped back around, the chaos of his emotions radiating off him. “You lied to me.” Confusion broke through JT’s expression. “Yesterday, when you told me where you were. You lied. I know, Ainsley saw you hailing a cab on fifth, three blocks from your apartment where you said you were.” Recognition dawned slowly on JT’s eyes.

“Bright, I can explain that.”

“I’m not done,” Malcolm replied, cutting him off. “When she told me where you were, do you know what I thought? I thought, finally. Two years we’ve known each other, and you’ve never lied. You’ve never broken a promise. If you said you were going to be there, you were there. And you lied one time, and I felt relieved. Because finally, you betrayed me.”

“Malcolm,” JT said, but the profiler put his hand up to keep him from stepping any closer.

“So, I went to see my father.”

“What did he say? That I’m showing my true colors?”

Bright let out a shaky breath, “You don’t get it,” he said. “He said I jumped to conclusions. He said that it’s a shopping district, the kind of place you go for gifts if you love someone. You see,” his voice cracked on the words, “My serial killer father thinks you’re trustworthy. And he’s a sociopath. What does that make me?” Bright watched all the anger melt out of JT.

“Bright…”

Malcolm took a step back, shaking his head. “You deserve better.”

“I don’t accept that.”

“You don’t get to not accept that,” Bright said, he knew he was yelling now. He could feel more guests falling silent, more attention swinging their way, but he could not stop the train now. The words fell out of him. “You said if I gave you a reason, you would walk away.”

“If you gave me a good reason,” JT growled, “This is bullshit.”

“You deserve someone that can trust you,” Malcolm shouted back.

“You think I don’t get you have trust issues? Like that hasn’t been obvious from your crazy ass since the minute I met you?” JT said, “I knew what I signed up for.”

Malcolm shook his head, “I’m not some tour of duty, JT. Your honor is intact. You gave it your best. It’s not your fault I’m too fucked up to love you.” He fought against the tears burning his eyes and tightening his throat. JT shook his head in return and took the remaining steps to take him into Malcolm’s air space.

“Tell me to go,” he said, his voice a quiet rumble.

“Go,” Malcolm replied, his voice quiet too.

“Mean it this time.”

Malcolm shoved him away, “Go!”

“No.”

“You deserve someone who can trust you.”

“I don’t care that you don’t trust me.”  
“You should care. This is not healthy.”

JT shook his head, “I knew exactly who you were when I said I wanted to be with you.” He reached into his pocket, and Malcolm stepped back again.

“No.”

“You want to know what I was doing yesterday?”

“No.”

JT held up the box. Bright heard his Mother gasp, but it felt miles away. He shook his head. “No.”

“You figured it out,” JT said, “I wasn’t planning to propose to you now, but yes, that’s where my head is. Bright, I don’t want someone different who trusts me. I want you, fucked up trust issues and all.” He stepped back, Malcolm stepped away again, and JT stepped forward once more, a dance both in complete sync and yet pushing them apart. This time his hand cupped the side of Malcolm’s face. “Push me away, if that’s what you want, but I’m going to love you even if you’re not with me.” Bright’s eyes rose to meet his, seeing nothing there but determination. “So, you’re not protecting me.”

Bright closed his eyes, errant tears escaping between his lashes, before meeting JT’s eyes again. “What if I never trust you?”

“Then, I prove you wrong, over and over again.”

“JT I can’t…”

“You keep saying what I do and do not deserve. What about what you deserve? You don’t deserve to be alone because of what your father did. You don’t deserve to keep hurting yourself.” JT shook his head. “Yes, you have trust issue. Big ones. You’re also vain, even though you pretend not to be. You think you’re smarter than 99% of people because you are, which is its own kind of infuriating, and you are terrible at admitting you are wrong. You do not know how to take care of yourself even when it’s killing you. You’ve never met a bullet or a bomb you haven’t thrown yourself in front of. And oh yes, you’re crazy as a hell.” He looked straight into Bright’s eyes, “I knew all of this. I knew all of this before I chose you, and I chose you. So stop acting like I’m going to realize you have some great flaw, and I’ll leave. I already know them. I know all the other things too. That the way your mind works makes me just stop and watch you sometimes because it is a wonder to see. That you’ve been through all this shit, and you still show up to work and you laugh and you still believe in people even though they haven’t given you much reason to. You act like you’re so cynical, but I have never met anyone who cared about the victims and the criminals both, as much as you do. You always believe in their ability to change. And you enter a room with so much energy that even when it's overwhelming, it’s still just…captivating. I know all of this, the good and the bad, all of it. And I love all of it…because I love you.” 

Malcolm felt all his resolve fading, “Wow,” he said, breathless. “I’ve…never heard you say so many words at once.”

“When do you ever let me get the chance?” he replied.

“Kiss him!”

It was Edrisa’s voice, and with a start, Malcolm realized for the first time since this conversation began that they were not alone. His eyes shot to her, standing a few feet away, covering her mouth like she was just as surprised she had said it. He looked back at JT, whose eyes had not left Malcolm’s face even with the interruption.

JT who was steady, trustworthy, strong, brave, so stubborn.

JT who loved him.

JT asked with his eyes if it was alright, and Malcolm gave a fraction of a nod under his touch. JT’s lips were on his, soft and gentle, wanting and asking. What was left of Bright’s defenses melted away, and he leaned into the kiss. He felt JT’s arm slide around his back, pull him closer. He felt in the kiss all the desperation that JT had hidden before. He was afraid to lose Malcolm, the profiler realized. Malcolm curled his injured hand into the back of JT’s shirt. He heard a whoop—definitely Edrisa again—and what sounded like a smattering of applause—which would be the guests. He laughed against JT’s lips and pulled back, the emotion all released in the sound.

“I’m not ready to marry you.”  
“I know. I’ll ask later.”

“What if I’m not ready then?”

“Bright, use that brain of yours. Haven’t you realized? I’m a very patient man.” Malcolm pulled him back again, kissing him once more. This time when he pulled away, he was smiling despite himself. JT ran his thumb across Malcolm’s cheek to wipe away the tears. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Alright,” Jessica said, motioning to the crowd. “Show is over. Back to your mingling, and your donating.” She looked at Malcolm with a raised eyebrow and dropped her voice, “If I’d known you were providing the show, I wouldn’t have paid for a band.” Her words were harsh, but Malcolm heard in her tone how happy she was. Jessica Whitly loved JT. Loved him enough that she did not make much of how poor and unconnected he was. She gave her son a gentle smile and swooped off to corral her guests.

“I knew you picked a good one,” Ainsley added, throwing a smile to JT before following her mother. Malcolm was aware that Gil and Dani were smiling too, but they left them to each other without a word.

Then they were alone in the crowded room, hopelessly, desperately orbiting each other, stuck in their gravitational pull.

“People are dancing,” JT said.

“Detective JT Tarmel, do you want to dance with me?”

“Do I look like I just want to stand here?” he asked. He pulled Malcolm close and guided him to where the music, an orchestra because of course it was, was playing. “You know how to dance.”

“Yeah, I hate this music,” JT said, then spun with him, “But I do know how to dance to it.”

“Next time we go out, you can take me to hear your music.”

“You’d hate it.”

“Oh, I don’t like classical,” Bright said, “I really only like pop. My alarm clock is set to a positive pop playlist.”

JT groaned, “Wait…why didn’t you tell me that. I take it back, there was a flaw I didn’t know about.” He teasingly pulled away, but this time Bright pulled him back.

“Too late, you’re stuck with me now.”

The detective smiled and stole a kiss off Bright’s lips. “That’s exactly the way I want it.”


End file.
